so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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