By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
You was so high that you insisted that you heard someone whistle, then you insisted they was trapped in the wall!
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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