i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Perfect. I'll put on my party clothes and write emergency numbers on my arm
Randomize