i can't believe i had my finger in that
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Randomize
