so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
we tried to pick out bridesmaid dresses with pockets so we could sneak flasks in with us. what the fuck is the point of a dry wedding?
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
I got arrested for "public intoxication". Fuckers threw me out of the bar into public... i mean shit they have thirsty Thursdays. And I get thrown out for self serve Sundays plus a citation.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
I told my mom that I was just gonna go check the mail. It's been 19 hours, and I woke up in a hot tub covered in chocolate, with a text from her sayin "have fun sweetie"
Randomize
