I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
You do realize that you're sleeping with a man who is part of a gay harem, right?
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Randomize