I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
I made her dinner: Beefaroni with grated parmesan cheese on top. Luckily she showed up drunk and gave me head, "For spending so much time preparing."
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
You left your underwear on the fireplace
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
Randomize
