I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
Randomize
