dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
We are all done wearing pants today
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
Randomize
