after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
You rolled onto your side and told me 'this is the recovery position'. That was after you were stoned. You've done this way too much.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
Randomize
