i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
I want to be your penis for a week.
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
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