I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
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