I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
So drunk I thought the door was feeling me up for a seconds
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
Randomize
