she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
it was not a walk of shame, it was a ferry ride of shame, and i'm not ashamed, so technically it was just an early morning ferry ride. wearing yesterday's clothing
and semen
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Randomize
