Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
Randomize