Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
He lured me round with the prospect of sex and then made me proofread his CV and spoon. I fucking hate this guy.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
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