i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
You're so nebulous sometimes
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
where are my eyebrows?
Sitting in the dr office she literally looked at my throat and goes have you been having oral intercourse
Randomize
