We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
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