just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I swear if she hugs me I'm going to bleach my body
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
The quality of my porn watching experience has significantly declined. Thanks shattered iphone screen
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
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