i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
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