Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
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