Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
standing in line at subway, they've got 'stand up and get crunk' blaring. the lines out the door and everyone is dancing. Lombardi Gras rules.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
Randomize
