So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize
