Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
Bachelorette party buss just rolled into down town. DTF, "horny hotties inside" and "show us your dicks" written on the windows....this could get interesting.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
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