belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
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