No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
Randomize
