I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
eggs and jello shots do not qualify as 'brunch'
Crashed the mayor's bday party, no list for some reason. Wore suits. Ludacris was there.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
drunkkkkk be here I heart you
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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