Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
your fucking longboard fell on me while we were having sex you fucking hipster
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