Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
Well there's a microwave in my yard now too. I fucking Bruce/Caitlyn Jennered decathloned that bitch.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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