summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
I'm now having weird sexual fantasies about that riverdancing figure skater. So thanks for that.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
