I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
Randomize
