Christians are straight up FREAKS
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
The bartender told me the best pick-up line was to look deep into her eyes and tell her your gonna flick her vagina
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize
