All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
The neighbor just poured gasoline on his 2 brush fires and proceeded to shoot Roman candles at them 🤔
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