Pregnant stripper...not hot.
am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
i've learned that i'm good at stealing things. like live cats.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
I think I just accidentally agreed to become a surrogate for a gay couple
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
Randomize
