the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Randomize
