I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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