Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Randomize
