you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
