I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
Randomize
