this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
sometimes i really wish you were a nugget.
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
A real best friend would support the hoe in me. Not remind me of what happened the last time I slept with a boss
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
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