upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
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