One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
also dude totally apologize for the whole drunken "want something in my mouth" text
after giving head I just always feel like I need like. ice cream. as both a means of getting the lingering sperm out of my mouth, and a congratulations.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
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