if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
I think drinking everclear was a better idea than taking a night class.
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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