did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
"Tuesday" and "open-bar" shouldn't be used in the same sentence.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize