like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
I will tell my future kids about the time I went to the bar with a stomach virus. Like a champ.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
Randomize