I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
Guys with integrity exist just to rain on my slut parade.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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