you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
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