i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
He called me a "functional alcoholic" like its a bad thing.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
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