I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I have decided that today will be all about indulgence and hedonism.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
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