Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

Sorry McFly1985 hasn't picked any favorites yet.

ADVERTISEMENT

(515): View more from Iowa

She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.

Fav 6 895 2544
share tweet
(814): View more from Pennsylvania

There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?

Fav 5 1417 691
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(336): View more from North Carolina

I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.

Fav 10 4224 1136
share tweet
(603): View more from New Hampshire

I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way

Fav 13 1994 1096
share tweet
(416): View more from Toronto

You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.

Fav 4 2182 780
share tweet
(618): View more from Illinois

Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!

Fav 11 2118 1200
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(706): View more from Georgia

I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them

Fav 10 1801 961
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(310): View more from California

note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.

Fav 1 468 807
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(440): View more from Ohio

I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.

Fav 0 32 12
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT