I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Randomize
