k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
oh my god. separately texting an Allie and an Ally while drunk is hard, and I'm climbed 1/2 way up a bridge pier.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
I just blacked back in and I'm at a kids birthday party in a suit and people are calling me uncle Carl. Never having your homemade liquor again.
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
can you tell me why i woke up in a diaper and combat boots?
Randomize
